ok, shoot, i am a little afraid. but i’m not about to let it rule my life. yesterday i had a surfing accident. the fin on my board took a giant chunk out of my thigh and i had to get nine stitches (i didn’t cry though, not to flex… officially big girl status), but i was terrified. i thought ‘there’s no freaking way that I’m going to surf, again.’ but as i listened to “fear” by kendrick, i was reminded that life is too freaking short. next summer i know i’ll get back on that board.
this incident made me think of other fears we all have. rejection is a big one. in fact, a friend recently told me that he has a hard time making friends because of this fear. everyone is afraid of some form of rejection. rejection on the job. rejection in love. rejection from friends. but, honestly, i try to live life by asking ‘what’s the worst that can happen? what am i giving up, because i’m afraid of the risk?’ a risk that is probably so small that, if you think about it in hindsight, it seems silly to worry about. i mean, if we never put ourselves out there, we stand to remain alone or unfulfilled. sure, there’s always the chance that we’ll get our egos bruised or we’ll fail, but, personally, id take the bruised ego, over wondering “what if?”. the thought of looking back with regret is tragic to me.
i know that if i lived in fear, id constantly think:
“ill prolly die anonymous,
ill prolly die with promises,” (kendrick)
ill prolly die with unchecked boxes on my bucket list.
but here i am. bravely saying:
ill prolly die known,
ill prolly die fulfilled,
ill prolly die with memories i made checking all of those boxes.
