disclaimer: please excuse my undeniable pessimism. i’m simultaneously crying and writing. i’ve come to make this a habit, yet it doesn’t make for the cheeriest of posts. regardless, let’s begin.
i’ve known all along that social media is fake. that’s the whole reason i started this blog in the first place. to do my part in making it “real”. at least as much as i can. & sure, society can be partially to blame society for the desire to only convey a false reality, we have to also recognize that it’s freaking written into the design of the apps. think about it: we post for “likes”, we save our stories to a section called “highlights”, we determine our worth based on “followers”. who wants to follow or like an account that’s depressing?????
i did an exercise in class once where we had to go through our instagram and look at the content we post – our body language, the clothes we’re wearing, etc., and compare it to how we were really feeling at the time. every person i talked to had told me that they posted a photo of them smiling when they were at a low point at least once. every. single. person. & i’m included in that group.
& tonight as i read an essay for class, i realized that it’s not just social media that’s fake. it’s life in general. the author of the piece wrote about how she convinced everyone that she was happy, and that life is all fine and dandy, but on the inside, she was grieving over the death of her mother…. & i felt that.
not that my mom passed, (she is alive & well), but the concept of hiding our true feelings. of tirelessly trying to convince everyone (& even ourselves) that we’re okay. that it’s fine. when, if we stop to think about it, are we? for me, often, yes. i’m generally a happy person. but have i also mastered the art of hiding when i’m upset, without question.
so what the frick do we do? how do we stop this? how do we make reality real? can we? or will we have to settle for reminders that life isn’t all hunky dory all the time? that everyone fakes it? that happiness is often a facade? i really hope not.
